Reply to Are all the good men really taken by early thirties?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think 35 is a big turning point. Guys who remain single longer than that tend to be odd. You’re better off finding someone who’s been divorced once they’re past that point.[/quote]Odd? Or maybe just maybe, some people don’t want to get married.  It’s unbelievable that people hold marriage on a pedestal. [b]Everybody I know that’s been married or is married says they would never do this marriage thing again[/b] but everybody rushes out to do it. Studies have shown that married women are leading the unhappinest human categories. [/quote]

What in the actual eff are you trying to convince people of? Every single person you know hates their marriage? That is what you have convinced yourself of because no one ever picked you?

I really do hope you not only belive this but also that you share it publically. It makes Id'ing the lunatics so much easier.

- 52 yo man still madly in love with his awesome wife after 33 years. Also the son to two wonderful people still madly in love after 56  years.[/quote]

The percentage of happy marriages is very low though [/quote]

DP.
Define happy.

"Happiness" is overrated. I sometimes envy my single mom by choice friend. She is " happier" in the sense that her space is exactly as she wants it, and she does not feel sad over unmet expectations from a partner since she does not have one.

I have to compromise a lot with my DH. I'd like the house to be different. I'd like much much more romance and communication. But while certain aspects of my life are more unhappy than hers, my kids are definitely getting double the love, emotional and financial security that her kids are getting. I'd trade much more "happiness" for that.[/quote]
If you were happy, you wouldn't be peeping this hard over your "friend's" shoulder and comparing your lives.[/quote]

Touche. Like I said, happiness is overrated.[/quote]

Peace of mind exists and not overrated. I know I wouldn't survive if I remained married to my exH.

Wanting kids, marriage as a self serving goal is a very wrong motivation for pegging yourself to someone. Women are under so much pressure that they don't make good and rational decisions in their 20s and 30s about marriage: is that man really a good human being, is he a good provider, partner? Many women just get married no matter what in a hope that he will "grow" [/quote]

You make some good points. In your opinion, is there ever a good reason for marriage?[/quote]

I think entering marriage  with an understanding that it's likely NOT forever, with a good prenuptial agreement stipulating the parties obligations, including family psychologist etc several times a year would be responsible. It's like creating a company that you would sell in 10-15 years. Act accordingly and think hard about what you want to get at your exit as shareholder and don't allow the other shareholder take advantage of your contributions. [/quote]

I like this. And people will be less likely to take each other for granted if they had solid contracts.[/quote]

Yes, that and also a security of knowing what you would get in 5, 10, 15, 20 years of marriage. Having financial planner look at it for both of future spouses. Because marriage is a contract ! Of course you can go no prenup but then people end up in court auguring over what constitutes 50% and who should get more or less than 50% and why (cheated, contributed less financially, contributed less with kids and other BS)[/quote]

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