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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have noticed many parents we know who are superstars in their fields have average/below average children. The kids are not motivated.

I wonder if they were born less intelligent or it is their upbringing.

We just spent the weekend with a family whose parents are some of the most intelligent kind people we know. Their kids are an absolute disaster in every way possible.[/quote]

Funny you say this. My mom had a friend  who was very educated and well to do  who had two nightmares of kids. Horribly horribly behaved in every way. Now one is a neurosurgeon and the other is an anesthesiologist. [/quote]

I have three siblings. When we were growing up, my dad was a very successful lawyer and my mom was very focused on it, but had her own full time career (with flexibility). We all did well in school, but one of my brothers was VERY mischievous and got into trouble in high school. Many teachers hated him and he was a difficult teenager to parent.

He ended graduating from a top university and is incredibly successful today - we’re all pretty high achieving but he is by far the most successful of us financially. He is in a senior leadership role at a top global financial firm.

One of my uncles was also a really difficult rebellious teen and ended up being a successful anesthesiologist.[/quote]

NP. Can I ask what you attribute this to? Like how would you explain it? Risk taking tendency? Low self esteem? Or was he just too smart to connect with most kids when he was younger? When did he start to improve where people liked him and he started being more successful? (Especially your brother since I guess you know him best)[/quote]

I honestly have no idea! He just came out mischievous. He was always tinkering with things as a toddler and getting into trouble. He had no social issues, was completely neurotypical, but just his personality has always been testing boundaries. My parents channeled that energy into sports as much as possible for him, and always had him in structured programs to remain out of as much trouble as possible. Fortunately he was a good student -even if he infuriated teachers - and he had some drive in college to achieve and start taking on prestigious degrees and internships which led him from one thing to the next. He is a risk taker for sure and combined with his high intelligence it has helped him achieve. All to say, he got into some serious trouble as a teenager but thankfully he turned out great. He was super challenging to parent but I have great parents who did everything they could. Gave him opportunities, put him in therapy, consulted with psychologists on how to parent him, made sure they were doing everything they can so he did well in school etc. and were present with us.[/quote]

I’m also going to add that an element of it is luck. Plenty of great parents have challenging kids who aren’t able to turn around. [/quote]

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