Reply to Read my Dad's memoir; description of my childhood was a gut punch

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[quote=Anonymous]OP I think I relate. It's like you want to think you are important to your parent and they love you unconditionally and abundantly and it's just another reminder they are completely self-involved and self serving and what you created in your head was fanasy? is that it?

My mother frequently says "parenting has been a complete disappointment" and she's not sure she would have done it again if she knew. She set the bar high and we got great grades, went to top Universities, got good jobs, married nice people, had kids, etc. We're not criminals mooching off people and drowning in drug addiction or anything.

I finally had to accept she would never be pleased and every sign I got that she just wasn't that into me was correct. I created a fantasy in my head, but there was plenty of evidence she was self-involved, hated parenting, had unrealistic expectations for us and had some personality issues. Part of me missed the days I ignored the evidence and created a fantasy world, but accepting reality also helped me have better boundaries with her and take care of myself. [/quote]

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