Reply to Scott Wolf (Party of Five) and wife Kelley are divorcing

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A sane person would not act like Kelley, even when provoked by a narc (which may not even be the case. We do NOT know.)[/quote]

Narc’s just dont provoke, they methodically destroy over a long period of time with many multiple cycles of abuse. Of course it could be something else but his statement gave him away. Victims of long term abuse absolutely look like Kelly.  It is a disservice to abuse victims to pretend like they come out of these situations mentally intact. It takes years, sometimes even decades for these victims to recover. She was filmed for six months in the Real World 24 hours a day and she was so sane and calm she was annoyingly boring.  She’s not bipolar. [/quote]

Isnt the definition of bipolar, extreme moods in both directions, highs and lows?[/quote]

No Bipolar is a genetic chemical imbalance in the brain that can be treated by meds. Kelly probably has thousands of hours if reality TV footage that proves she’s sane. I am fairly confident that what Kelly is suffering is CPTSD also known as Complex PTSD which is often misdiagnosed as and can look like Bipolar disorder on the surface.  CPTSD is caused by chronic trauma usually in the form of repeated abuse as is typically seen in victims of narcissistic abuse.  Victims of CPTSD and are often stuck in flight or fright mode from walking on eggshells waiting for the next abuse cycle. Idealize (lovebombing) Devalue (abuse) Discard (threats of divorce,etc) then Calm then back to lovebombing. The charming Narcissists victim is co dependent on their abuser and the cycle is so insidious and manipulative the victim begind to lose their sense of reality. This cycle can repeat multiple times a year over decades until the final Discard which is where Kelley is now, leaving the codependent victim devastated often leading to a meltdown. As a result of abuse, CPTSD victims have a destabilized sense of self which causes like depression and anxiety which can be treated with meds but what she really needs is a great therapist and an amazing attorney.  She’s not crazy, she’s abused. [/quote]

So you have seen her medical records to know all her diagnoses?

Will you at least acknowledge that drinking whiskey straight out of the hospital is a bad idea?[/quote]

I don’t have to see her medical records. It’s playing out like a textbook version of Narcissistic abuse, even the alienating of the children from their mother. Teens are particularly vulnerable to this manipulation because they are already rebellious. The parent in charge will lay down the law, then insteading of supporting them and the rules, the narc will do the exact opposite creating a wedge. Narcs do this to completely isolate and discredit their victim and they are cool and methodical under pressure while they do it. It’s difficult to see or understand unless you’ve experienced it but once you have, you know it when you see it.

I agree she absolutely needs help. One THOUSAND percent!!! I think as a codependent with CPTSD she is melting down for multiple reasons including abandonment, fear of the future and aging, loss of nuclear family unit, loss of identity (he’s a celeb and they falsely portrayed a “perfect family” for years ) and add in perimenopause which in itself is horrific. But she’s NOT chronically mentally ill. She IS however in crisis and making terrible decisions right now because she isn’t thinking correctly. However, she should NOT be in a bar drinking with a hospital band but she’s melting down and trying to reclaim what’s left of her life. She was forced into a mental hospital and that was her eff you to the brother in law who called her Dad and put her there. The BIL who should not even have been in HER house. The BIL was in her house “helping” so Scott could control things from afar and act as a spy. Narcs HAVE to be in control.

Kelley needs rescue meds, intense therapy, immediate help, true friends and support now because she is in crisis, not because she is bipolar but because she is abused. [/quote]

I agree that Kelley needs all those things. My sense is that she either resists treatment or does it sporadically, which is unfortunately common for mentally ill people. They feel good for a few days and stop taking their meds, and the cycle of bad behavior starts again.

I think her family was attempting to get that kind of help when her dad called the cops. She probably knows the right things to say to get out of the hospital.  It usually involved telling the treatment provider that you have no intention of hurting yourself or anyone else.  Once you are stabilized and make that declaration, they let you out.  So she is essentially stuck in a cycle of dangerous behavior followed by treatment.  Her family cannot force her into a treatment program unless she is an ongoing danger to herself or them. Everyone is stuck unless she is willing to enter a serious Inpatient mental health facility.  [/quote]

Sure, she can go to an Inpatient facility for this current momentary crisis but then what? There is no existing treatment that will relieve her of his narcissistic abuse and control except for going No Contact.

She can’t do that because 
1) the kids keep them connected who he will continue to weaponize them against her and 
2) His celebrity ensures she can’t ever get away from him. No matter where she goes, there he is.  She’s connected to her abusive yet charismatic Narc for life and he’s in the power position.

She knows she can’t ever escape him and feels cornered. She’s not mentally ill. There’s too much footage that shows no history. Perimenopause combined with CPTSD and trauma is real. The BIL living in her house refusing to leave and meddling in her parenting  on Scott’s behalf is a huge red flag. She definitely needs help.  I will die on this hill in her corner. [/quote]

You are speculating and have no idea. This crisis she’s in goes way beyond perimenopause. Her own dad called 911 on her. You have 0 evidence that Scott was abusive aside when she muttered it when she was being arrested, but she also said the cops were abusive. [/quote]

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