Reply to H’s ADHD can’t be fixed. Now what?

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Reply to "H’s ADHD can’t be fixed. Now what?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP with an update.

I’ve decided to move out and end things. There are a lot of issues at play, but the final nail in the coffin for me was that he ultimately prefers to spend his time creeping on random women’s Facebook pages than with me. One problem we have is we have very little time together and almost no sex life, and I’ve told him multiple times he needs to stop spending his evenings scrolling on his phone (at one point it was so bad, he’d be on his phone from the time he got home from work until 1-2am).

He’s also done things like gone on dating apps, and this just feels like the latest iteration of “I’m not cheating! I’m not talking to anyone! You’re really going to leave me over looking at a Facebook page?!”

The whole “I’ll turn my phone off if I’m not using it” thing was a lie as well, yesterday when I got home I could tell he was on it and trying to hide it.

He’s been in therapy and trying various medications for years for AdHD, depression, and addiction, and keeps promising me his behavior will change once he finds the RIGHT doctor or meds or therapist. I told him ultimately he chooses his own behavior, and he’s chosen to behave in destructive ways and blame it on an “illness”.

I started looking at apartment yesterday and will continue today. I had to take the kids along with me so they know what’s going on. My 9yo took it extremely well, so I guess she’s relieved to get away from it.[/quote]

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