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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've done both. I've drunk every night, and I've drunk only when going out socially. Honestly the latter is more fun. Doing it every night at home by yourself is not that fun. And having a lower tolerance is more fun. Last night I drank one beer at a soccer game while chatting with friends and I had a nice little buzz.

My ex drinks 5 drinks, give or take, almost every night. It's not attractive and it's not fun. He's 46 years old and he never grew up. He puts no thought into his health, physical or otherwise. He never thinks, do I have healthy coping mechanisms? What can I do other than drink? Is alcohol a crutch? Is this a good example for my kids?

When I stopped drinking at home every night (a habit that solidified during COVID), I realized that I just wanted a little pop of sugar. So now I have a Poppi instead. It gives my brain that same, "Ah, I'm rewarding myself at the end of a long day" feeling.[/quote]

Yup. Booze isn’t the great evil but i feel like you reach a point and it’s just like “really… you’re still drinking?” And people who still party are just … sad.[/quote]

Drinking and partying are two different things.  Having a glass of wine with dinner every day isn’t clubbing.[/quote]

And normals have a really strange view of alcoholism.  Alcoholics don’t drink to party or be young.  Almost all drink to numb out emotions, pain and trauma.  Not all of us look like that bum passed out on a sidewalk, but emotionally we might as well be.  [/quote]

I don’t know if it was the pandemic or if the pandemic just helped bring into focus what people do in their free time, but I have at least two good friends, whose kids play with mine, who are very clearly high functioning alcoholics. Super successful, but they come home and put the drinks away - and more importantly can’t NOT do it. They’re fun (until they’re not, but that’s usually late in the night) but what for me is a wild Saturday night is their Monday Tuesday Wednesday. I just can’t fathom doing it everyday - the effect on sleep must be devastating. I used to wonder how they managed to party and be so successful and then I realized - they’re just alcoholics. They’re not partying, they’re drinking because they can’t stop.

And they’d never accept being called an alcoholic. My BIL, who is a helluva guy when sober, puts back 12-16 beers a night and gets up and goes to work out at 545 every day and then goes to work on the trading floor. He knows something is deeply wrong and tried AA, but was horrified by what he saw as “losers”. He said to me “how can I be an alcoholic - my bonus last year was $450k! I’m doing everything right, but I can’t not stop and get two beers on the way home to get ready for the case waiting for me.”

Alcoholism comes in all shapes and forms but all three people I’m thinking of were fun, life of the party people who didn’t drink an unusual amount for their peer group … but everyone else quit or barely drinks and these guys kept going and now they can’t stop. [/quote]

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