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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sounds like your DH IS contacting you too much on a girl’s weekend — a one-off text, fine, but he should be able to take care of his own baby without bothering you. Sounds like he is either incompetent or trying to punish you for going away and seems like on some level you are sensing it.

And agree with a PP that it sounds like you are not being present enough and they are annoyed you are on your phone.[/quote]

I’m the OP. Neither is true. My husband is a great father but I spend know time with the baby. I go back to work this Monday so I’ve been able to be at home for the last 4 months really learning my baby.

My husband didn’t blow up my phone but he did text me pics of the baby ( he rolled over for the first time when I was home). He asked about some breast milk question, how to get him to sleep, and what to do because he wouldn’t fall asleep without trying to nurse. I responded each time. I don’t see that as being incompetent. He’s trying to see what I do to match that.

They ladies may have been trying to warn me or just jealous. I cook almost all of the meals and take care of the home the most. My husband makes most of our money. He bought me the house I want, doesn’t question when I spend money ( unless extravagant), and takes care of the outside of the home and any repairs without me asking him twice. We have a good system and I like it.

Some asked how life has been with a newborn and going back to work. They mentioned how little time that window is between getting home and putting baby to bed. Asked about when we will have a second kid. They balked at the response that I have done most of the parenting and try to have my husband come home to a hot meal. [/quote]

“ He asked about some breast milk question, how to get him to sleep, and what to do because he wouldn’t fall asleep without trying to nurse. “

He didn’t know how to soothe the baby or how your baby was eating or sleeping prior to your trip?

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Seriously.

I have a friend whose husband never changed a diaper. I couldn't respect a "dad" like that but it works well enough for her (although she does say he holds all the power in their marriage and she's not happy about that). [/quote]

OP here. He changes diapers. He does a lot of care on the weekends in between work. He took 2 weeks off after we had our son to be there for me. He did all the diaper changing and I did nothing but feed and rest. He took care of the house and the baby. Now I do that because he works 60+ hour weeks as a CFO. I don’t mind it. [/quote]

Two whole weeks? OMG WOW. No wonder you think it's "amazing".

You need to open your eyes. Lots of men take far more parental leave than that. It's NORMAL to take more leave than that. Has he got you convinced that he's Mr. Super Duper Important and can't?

You don't mind it now, because you're young and energetic and only have one kid and haven't even tried the working mom juggle for one day. You might feel differently when you have more kids and are alone with them every weeknight. Men who think they need to work long hours can make for a very lonely marriage.[/quote]

OP here. He’s a CFO. I know what I was getting into when I dated and married him.

I am more traditional. I wanted to be a wife and a mom above all else. I have a career but that’s not nearly as important as having a family. That’s my personal choice. My mom was a SAHM in the 80’s/90’s. I do come from a more traditional Midwest life.

I’m also not young either. I’m 35. We don’t plan on having another kid given my age and my husband being 39. We joke that we are too old to have more kids. It took us a while to have conceive so he will be a one and only most likely. [/quote]

But don't you understand that some men are capable of impressive jobs and also are more present at home and see their kid more than two days a week? It's weird that you think being a CFO (of how big an entity you haven't told us) would require such long hours. Is he the CFO of a major corporation? Or is he the CFO of a small nonprofit?

If you're not having another kid, then this will probably be manageable and it certainly limits your financial risk. But still, you seem really naive-- frankly it's weird to be 35 and so trusting of any man. Sometimes men screw their wives over, and it's not always the ones you might think. Eyes wide open.

Your husband does not sound "amazing" because he has a job and does some chores and approves your spending and took two weeks off. He sounds like a normal adult. And that's probably what your friends are trying to get you to see.[/quote]

OP here. He’s a CFO of a major corporation.

I find him amazing and that’s what matters.

I’m good if anything ever happens. I have a great career to fall back on, savings, and investments that are just mine, totaling close to 700k.

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