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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I haven’t read all the replies… but are people really hosting dinner parties & cookouts that often? We almost never invite adults to our house, and have very rarely been invited to other people’s houses. We occasionally eat out with other families, but usually if kids & parents get together, we meet at a neutral location and go for a hike, visit a museum, etc.

My parents were/are very welcoming of people dropping by but also never hosted dinner parties. Maybe it’s a class thing or regional thing.

As for the OP, yes, I have friends like that, but oh well. We keep inviting them to do stuff & continue to have their kids over to play. The ones I stop inviting are the ones who always cancel after saying they can meet up. [/quote]

Yes. We actually host dinner parties, brunches and  tea parties.

But, we have seasons that we host people, and then months that we do not host at home.  For example - we have not hosted large groups for dinner at home since November, all the way to Feb.  We have only called very close family for dinner and it has not been super fancy.  March-April and May will be the time that I will host several dinners and tea-parties.  Each will include different groups of people.  Then I will be busy in Sept-Oct to host a series of religious celebrations.   Some other families like to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas.  So, I will cook several dishes and take it to their homes for celebrations like each year.  My Thanksgiving and Christmas remains limited to my close family, and it very often means catered food.

In the months that I don't entertain at home. I basically invite people to restaurants, plays, dinners, spa, walks and movies OR we attend as guests the parties we are invited to.  The truth is that there is a real cost in terms of physical labor, time, effort, money, planning. stress etc.  Also, the "off times" is required so that the house can be made 'guest and entertaining ready'.  Besides, your normal regular life also continues.

If you are calling large groups of people - there is economy of scale for sure, but, your entire house has to be 'guest and entertaining ready' to accomodate everyone.   The reason that I entertain in cluster is that I can book some help a few months out, as well as economize on booze, cleaning, food etc.  The house gets deep cleaned and spruced for one party, and it remains quite clean and spruced up for the next one too with a bit of effort.

It is NOT EASY to host because you have to clean a lot, make space, figure out seating, figure out serving dishes and other stuff, before you even think of drinks, food, and entertainment.   And if you don't host regularly, you absolutely lose confidence in your ability to host.  You forget how to do things. Your brain does not function in the host mode at all. [/quote]

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