Reply to Self preservation Strategies when husband sucks but your staying together for thr kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Husband sucks but staying together for the kids. What are your self preservation strategies? No abuse, drugs or cheating involved. Just very different worldview and communication styles.  We have tried counseling and we will do it again but I have little hope. I'm also not interested in breaking up the family unit so divorce is not an option right now. Kids are 10 and 13[/quote]

A friend in your situation travels every 12 weeks. She visits friends and relatives for a weekend and detoxifies emotionally from the fraud that is her home life. The pandemic was very hard because they were stuck under one roof.[/quote]

geez. absent any intractable financial issues, why would anyone think it’s better for kids to live in a home that is a toxic fraud instead of divorcing?[/quote]
If my kid's life is in danger after I leave, but try to get them back, it's better for the kid to live in toxic environment. Ofcoure it would be the best to leave with the kid and I say it as a kid who had to grow up in the toxicity.
I left, DP refused to show me out child. Had I gone to court, he would have taken somebody out. I did not know that he was crazy until I left. Something was really not right and I feared for the child's life. It was not hard to notice that I am not dealing with a well person. He had help up very well until he didn't.
I got so much crap from everyone for not 'fighting for my kid'. Comes out, the DP had some mental issues that got worse when I left.
Because of his own problems, he is no more. I'm glad it was him and not the kid or me. I noticed his downward spiral and didn't just go
'fighting for my kids' and put us both in danger. I waited it out. 
[/quote]

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