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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Our mother - typically in good shape, age 79 - fell and broke a rib. She is thousands of miles from us in a relatively remote location where she lives and where we grew up. I live in the midwest. My sister in the Mountain west. 
At any rate,  sister said she thinks we should move mom to her state nearby so we can attend to her in her older age. 
Mom would refuse to live in the midwest, and she might even refuse to live in MW, although she does love it there. 
Sister wants me to help pay for her to get a condo or help out financially in some way. 
I said no, it would overextend us. And, my husband would never agree to helping out any relative. 
I don't want our usually close relationship to unravel over this.

I would imagine we have more net worth than sister via real estate that we weren't planning on selling.

Husband and i have worked our butts off with no help from either side so we'd like to enjoy our retirement doing the things we planned. I've just been diagnosed with cancer, that will likely limit my life expectancy, so this plays in on it too. I plan on retiring next year and would have time to visit mom more often, if needed and if I feel good enough.

How do people navigate this?

[/quote]

Your mom has to agree to whatever solution you can offer, it can't be her choice. You need to love her, take care of her needs, not her wants. She needs to live where its affordable.[/quote]

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