Reply to Moved into house and husband doesn’t seem interested in doing house projects

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] - I just mean finding some art to hang, finding ways to organize things, getting some extra furniture that would look nice, upgrading old lights, etc.[/quote]

Another question here is - are you even going to pay attention to his input? If he wants to put up art that you don’t like, are you going to veto it? If you’re going to make all the decisions (and it’s 99% certain you will, every woman does) then it is unreasonable of you to expect him to care about or be involved in the process. You’re going to choose the art, furniture, and light fixtures, and he will have no say? Ok, it’s all you, go do it.[/quote]

OP here - yes I would listen to his input (e.g., if he says no, I won't do it, unless I suppose I REALLY want to do it, but I can't imagine decorative choices ever falling into that category). But what I was trying to say is that if decorating is going to fall 100% on me, should I really give him a right to say no whenever he wants to? If he wants to have a say, then I'd think he should put some effort into participating. It just seems a little unfair otherwise...

[/quote]

It depends, do you want to wallow in your misery or would you like to have a pleasant marriage? Sure, if he provides no assistance with any of the decorating, then he shouldn't get a say in how it is done. That's a "fair" way to look at it. It might also lead to discord down the road, which, yes, he is responsible for, but I think you have to look at how you want to live. Life is rarely exactly as we would like it to be. So you have to learn how to deal with the disappointments. Or you can live in the negative, it's really up to you. It sounds like you so badly want to be "right" that you don't care about anything else. [/quote]

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