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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Depends who you ask.

Coming from a man who is divorced, reasonably attractive (I give myself a solid 7), in good shape and go to the gym frequently, nice car, own my place, good job, good money, easy custody arrangement with an EX I get along with for the most part, pretty drama free and live my life I have no issues getting dates.  I've been on and off apps for the better part of five years and had one long term relationship that ended and decided I won't get into a committed relationship again.

I put in a lot of effort into a long term relationship only for it to be a waste, I thought I wanted to get married again, but that was the final nail in the coffin for me.  I put in a lot of effort, gave her a lot of time and spent a lot of money on her and her kids.  Mistake number one.  Mistake two was trusting anything she said as fact and mistake three was  sticking around and trying to make it work because "I put a lot into the relationship"  Sunken cost fallacy is a real thing.  At the end of the day I don't need to be with someone long term.  I have found if you posses the qualities I listed above it's easy to get into sexual relationships with women without commitment.  The amount of times I have slept with women on the first or second date is easier and more frequent than I thought could happen.  It's not like I'm even like a 10/10 or like Chris Hemsworth or anything.  I still got a lot of sex without having the burden of trying to "make things work".  Why should I commit?  Also, I'm not going to commit to someone that does sleep with me first date.  "I never do this", sure lady, tell yourself that to feel better we both know you're lying.

I have friends who tried OLD and it's a wasteland for them.  Nothing, no matches, not dates etc.  Not sure what they're doing or not doing but I get a lot of matches and have used it to my advantage.  I've also met women off of social media too so there's that, either way both have worked for me and so has the cold approach of just talking to them.

My exwife probably does well, she's a blonde women with a big butt and I'm sure she's popular with a certain group of guys.  I don't want to know and I don't care, but I'm sure she's not hurting for dates.  Finding committed men?  Don't know either my kids don't bring up any men's names so who knows.  I know she's dated but don't follow up and don't care.  As long as she's staying out of my business and makes good decisions in regards to our kids that's all that matters.  She smart so I'm sure she's fine.

Point being it can be fine, but there is a lot of trash to wade through.  And after a divorce and a failed long term relationship where I poured everything into it just to have it fail in spectacular fashion was enough for me to say...nope not doing that again and why should I?  Learned my lesson on that one, only a fool repeats mistakes more than once.

Thing is, if you're a guy and you have options there is no reason to commit to someone as chances are they're going to cheat, have emotional affairs or be in constant contact with ex-boyfriends all the time.  I know when I'm in a committed realtionship I don't keep in contact with exes (exwife is different obviously as is an exhusband), once the relationship is done I cut it off right there and block them like they don't exist.  Asking for someone to be faithful in return is apparently asking too much for most I just give back what I get.

Also the fact I've matched with women who literally went out on a date with a guy and then came to my house after that guy paid for dinner or whatever else and I ended up having sex with them with no effort whatsoever put me off of committed relationships as well.  I work too hard for my money I'm not going to be some fool who takes a woman out just for her to literally leave and ride on some other guy.  Nope.

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I don’t fault you, but this is all so gross and depressing, for women at least.  I wonder if they know and ok with just being used. They might be. [/quote]

It’s so sad that he described that as good.[/quote]

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