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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "We keep arguing about work and home responsibilities because we're both overwhelmed."
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[quote=Anonymous][quote]There are plenty of dads of young children at his salary level that get their work done in a way that allows them to be a contributing partner at home.[/quote] Oh I wasn't saying it can't be done. I'm saying OP's DH is presenting this as a fait accompli; his hours are inflexible, his workouts are a priority, therefore she's gotta handle it all. OK. Well, but it seems he's also expecting her to do everything for these kids. There's a name for that: it's a SAHM. As long as he wants OP to have a job, and he wants nothing to change for him, that means they outsource. And on $270K combined salary in this area, that's either tricky or impossible while also paying for daycare. So. He wants his job to be the only contribution (and frankly to have this 1955 arrangement)? Time to bring in more money dude. Now of course the easier, more equitable, healthier, and better-choice-as-a-father choice, is him actually participating in the family he created and working with his wife to help life move forward. But that's "impossible" because he's so "thorough", can't "multi-task", etc. It's BS. And yes I sound annoyed. As another PP pointed out, DH is running quite the con, and OP sounds like she's genuinely struggling. I think that sucks. [/quote]
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