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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am having a disagreement with my spouse about saying grace in a setting where not everyone is a "grace sayer."

One of us thinks that people who say grace should be able to say it wherever they are, including at someone else's house (who do not say grace) or at a restaurant with others who do not participate in this practice. This person thinks that everyone else should respectfully remain silent and refrain from eating until the grace has been said.

The other of us thinks that saying grace in a "mixed" situation is a bit obtuse, and that those who customarily say grace can forgo it on these occasions or quietly say it in their head, but they should not say grace aloud and not expect others to delay their dining.

What does DCUM think?[/quote]

Obtuse is used as a veiled insult for being stupid, simple minded, or willfully ignorant.

Why are you or your spouse calling people who say grace simple, stupid, and ignorant?

That’s a bad way to talk about people who think you are their friend. I would not want to be friends with someone who thought I was simple or ignorant because of my religion.

It says so much about you (or your spouse) that you would call people names because of their religion, and none of it good.

words associated with the adjective obtuse
slow to understand
dense
dopey
dull
dumb
imperceptive
insensitive
opaque
slow on uptake
stolid
thick

I think the correct answer is that neither people who say grace nor people who do not say grace eat with bigots who call their friends and acquaintances hurtful names behind their backs.

Better yet: be honest and tell your friends you find them ignorant and simple, and let them know who you really are so they won’t be disappointed when they lose a friendship. They will be glad to not hang out with backstabbing people who judge them negatively and think they are superior to them.

[/quote]
You are being obtuse, or willfully ignorant, of the post. OP did not say either person thinks religious people are obtuse for saying grace in general, only when saying it in "mixed company". Please learn to read before you start lecturing others on their use of language. [/quote]

This is definitely op.

“Please learn to read before you start lecturing others…”

Op- You are the smartest person ever. You are smarter than your spouse, your friends, etc.

You think you are so smart you can use a word that is extremely insulting to describe people you call your friends and nobody will catch on.

When someone points out what a disrespectful and two-faced person you are, you tell them to “learn to read.”

You think so very highly of yourself and think of other people as imbeciles.

Obtuse is an insult.  To say call your friends obtuse, and to tell someone to “learn to read,” means you are snobby and rude, as well as a bigot. [/quote]

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