Reply to Why does 4 kids seem so much more than 3?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think once you get to the 4th kid you tend to have a parent who is not working or only working very part time. So in that regard there is always a dedicated parent whose life is very kid-centered. I have 3 and my career is my 4th kid. I think one more kid would be the tipping point. I’m also still hanging on to keeping my home fairly near and tidy/organized. Whereas I think once you hit 4 + you’re the type of family that embraces the chaos so to speak. (Unless you’re like a Mormon blogger type with family to help you so you can maintain that Pinterest home). [/quote]

Once you have 4 kids in after school activities, it really doesn’t matter that one parent is home. There are still only 2 adults to manage driving/dinner/homework/bedtime.

Signed,
A SAHM of two with not much evening bandwidth to spare. [/quote]

That’s assuming there’s no extended family that helps out, no mothers helpers, and that all 4 kids do after school activities.

Assuming all four kids are neurotypical, by the time the youngest does after school activities and has actual homework (8?), the oldest kid or two should be able to do their own homework and manage their own bedtime, no?[/quote]

I'm the PP. If I had two more kids right now, (let's call them 9 and 6 since my kids are 3 years apart) they'd either be stuck home all the time with a grandparent or "mother's helper" or being drug to one of their two sibling's activities. Either way, its not remotely the experience my older two children had at those ages. Seems pretty unfair, but large families aren't concerned with individual attention, or actual parents caring for children. [/quote]

I’m a 4th child who was *dragged* to school pickups and activities. I did homework. Was it somewhat annoying to go food shopping with my mom after school while we waited for my siblings to be dismissed? Maybe? But if that was the worst thing about my childhood I’ll take it.

Also, my husband is 1 of 2. His parents were hyper focused on him and his sister in a way that was suffocating. And they were super coddled. Honestly I think another child would have helped diffuse the dynamic there more. And he’s not close with his only sibling to boot.  [/quote]

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