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[quote=Anonymous]Np: I got a Surprise pregnancy at 45.  Pregnancy is very tough with a 4 and 6 year old and being in my 40’s.  I’m very tired and can’t keep up the energy they need.

Pros: my husband has had to step up tremendously more than most dads do.  I didn’t realize how much before I was covering for him.  I’m talking every afternoon from 5-8pm.  I usually do the morning but that’s all I can handle.  We have no alone time together.  Luckily he really wants another do he is not resentful but our overall marriage and intimacy has taken a big hit.

second pro: my kids have had to become more independent.  Can’t pick up the 4yo anymore.  I can’t put them to bed because ‘mommy has to sleep with the baby in her belly.’   I’m more determined that they get and fix their own foods snd clean up.  They just dont get coddled as much anymore and for our family that’s been a good thing.

Cons: our house is too small and it’s very hard to move in this market.  My career which I was just starting to lean into will go back in the backseat again.  International trips we planned are put on hold again for at least couple years. Our college savings will go from maybe some private options to basically in state only.  My body is getting pretty beat up and not sure it will bounce back at this age. The mood swings also seem worse this time.  Many of my friends kids are celebrating high school graduations and I feel very far behind, and a bit lonely if that makes sense.

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