Reply to Over 50 and Older sister not speaking to me for more than 10 years

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As an adult I realized that my aunt (my mother's sister) is a psychopath. She has cut out various family members throughout her life. Sometimes she reconnects with some and tries to form alliances against other family members.

So my question is, has your sister cut ties with other family members or just you?[/quote]

My mother was not speaking to her mother at my sister's wedding. My mother not speaking to her mother, and then to her brother and her whole family continued until my mother became ill. My sister was also not speaking to anyone in the family except for my grandmother. People in my family stop speaking to each other. People then forget why they stopped speaking. I am the one who called my grandmother and extended family to tell them my mother was ill. My sister then started speaking to them, also. Somehow, she stopped speaking to me, and she started speaking to extended family.

This not speaking to each other is a family legacy, unfortunately.

As far as I know, my sister is only currently not speaking to me. "Everyone" else is speaking to me. [/quote]

Wow this is twisted. It also sounds like the only reason you're not cut off from other immediate family is because your parents and grandparents are dead. Relationships with cousins don't count if you were never particularly close with them.

In any case, you haven't done anything yourself in the 10 years of this estrangement. You keep claiming that you reached out, but apparently this just means BIL recently called you (not the other way around) and you apologized to him (not to your sister) about the dog incident (not about whatever else she's angry about).

Unless you take some sincere steps, nothing is going to change. Working with a therapist would be a great start to understanding your role and hers, because honestly some of your reactions on this thread, and your lack of friends, are alarming. Perhaps try really reaching out, sending your sister a card or something?

Failing you taking sincere action, you are going to have to get used to not having any close immediate family.[/quote]

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