Reply to S/O How do you justify having an affair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Having an affair gave me the courage to flee a bad relationship. [/quote]

I never understood this thinking. Boning someone to get courage.  I think leaving without resorting to doing ill like the other person allows you to keep your dignity and moral compass intact.  I’d feel slimy cheating no matter what my situation were.  I’m not sinking to their level.[/quote]

I agree, especially if your actions are going to harm another woman/family.  I don’t want to that to anyone.[/quote]

Pp here. My AP was a very close friend and separated from his wife at the time (and soon after divorced); we are still platonic friends, each happily married to people who know about this blip in our shared history.

Not asking you to understand it, but perhaps be grateful you’ve never been in my position with such low self esteem from a relationship with a longterm partner who turned out to be a truly rotten bastard. The bump in self esteem (really: it was so low that it took realizing I actually was still a worthy and attractive woman) had me renting an apartment and walking out the door within a week. I defied the prick and felt stronger than I had in years. Yay for me.[/quote]

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