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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Maybe OP could move to a state that has a lot of people with German and Norwegian ancestors.  Minnesota maybe?
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This is actually not a terrible idea -- there are parts of Minnesota where they've retained a lot of cultural traditions from "the old country" and there is a sense of community around them. You could meet people with similar familial backgrounds and maybe find things in common between your family's history and theirs. All without having to try and get a visa to live abroad and learn a new language. And if you have kids, you could raise them with more connection to your ancestry, but also as Americans since that is what you are.

This is the first concrete suggestion in this thread that I think actually addresses OP's problem in a practical way instead of yelling at her for feeling as she does. OP, think on this! I understand why you feel as you do and think it's valid, and this might be one way to address it.[/quote]

Actually, I don't think this is a good idea.  Trying to connect with people because of some common ancestry way back and because they share skin colour seems like a futile exercise.  I don't see how this would create a sense of belonging.[/quote]

So what do you suggest? This makes more sense to me than trying to move to Germany when you don't speak German, but it's obvious OP is seeking some kind of connection to a place and people. Her family is already scattered through the US, why not try moving to an area where she might find some people who are a similar amount removed from the immigrant generation and whose families might have similar stories. I don't think the issue is about shared skin color -- presumably OP meets white people all the time, but she doesn't feel like she belongs with them. This might offer some belonging. A community with deep German roots will likely also have German cultural events, be more likely to teach German in the local schools or at a community center, have a history of German-inspired arts, etc.

I know it seems really basic, but I've known many immigrants who are just one or two generations removed who have found community in immigrant enclaves with lots of families with shared heritage. I think there might be something to this.[/quote]

Given her comment about her ancestors emigrated on a whim, it's doubtful OP has any familiarity with their history and culture.  If she's feeling a lack of belonging, she's better off getting more involved in her local community whether through religion, volunteering, or hobbies.  This is a really transient place where it's hard to make strong personal connections, so I empathize with OP, I just think she's built a fantasy that doesn't reflect reality and won't actually solve her problem.

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I think OP was probably being glib about that -- I doubt her family emigrated on "a whim". I think it's just that her family doesn't seem to have an immigration story that can be easily conveyed. Maybe it's been lost, maybe her ancestors lied to their kids about why they immigrated, who knows.

Being around other people whose families immigrated from the same place around the same time could enable OP to adopt an immigration story, or to get some sense as to why her ancestors immigrated when they did. That could help give OP a sense of belonging in the US, to feel like she is part of a larger story of immigration, part of a migration pattern. Right now it sounds like she feels her family is very isolated in their immigration story -- coming over on their own and then never really settling anywhere in particular. That sounds really hard, frankly. Imagine if you didn't really know who your people were or how you wound up being born or living where you grew up? Whatever the story is, I think most people have some sense of that and OP doesn't. I get why she's searching.

And you said it yourself -- the DMV is a very transient play where it's hard to make personal connections. You suggest religion, hobbies, volunteering, which is what people always suggest, but I've done all those things in the DC area and it has not led to concrete community here because, as you point out, the area is so transient. People leave your church, your neighborhood, your volunteer org, they stop showing up to the same classes etc. It's been hard even to find more stable communities via kid's school because people here move so much.

But people in Minnesota or that part of the country stay put a bit more, which is why there are actually pretty stable communities of German and Norweigian descendants there. I think OP could maybe tap into that, if she doesn't mind the cold (which she must not if she's contemplated moving to Norway!).[/quote]

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