Reply to My friend seems surprised her ex is thriving domestically

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "My friend seems surprised her ex is thriving domestically "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I feel like if the OP in any thread can't actually relate to their question and make any headway Jeff should just delete threads after 10 interactions. There must be some metric to stop the trolling and lying that goes on here. It's obvious OP is not a friend to this woman and is just trying to stir up anti woman hate. Don't feed the troll.[/quote]

OP here. It's really fascinating how if the facts that I present don't align with some narrative that men are shitty partners in marriage, I must either not be a friend or that I'm trolling. A lot of you are REALLY invested in this notion and are reacting strongly to any suggestion to the contrary.

I've said from the start that I don't know the full story. What I do know is when they were together, I always saw a highly engaged partner and husband. He worked from home most of the time, even pre-pandemic while she commuted to an on-site workplace. He was usually the ones at the school events with the kids, did the meals when we ate at their house, etc. So I was always a bit surprised to hear her complaining about carrying more of the "emotional labor" and things like that. But, again, maybe I only saw the highlights.

I do know that a couple of years later, he at least outwardly projects having his shit more together. During the divorce, I tried to maintain relationships with both of them, but was more my friend's confident and kept the relationship with him more superficial, mainly driven by our kids' friendship. The only constant seems to be my friend's misery. It's almost like she's aghast that he isn't miserable. It's strange and I don't know how to respond except to encourage therapy and trying to move on with her own life and stop letting him live rent-free in her head. Someone said sounds depressed -- that could be as well. I'll add consulting a psychiatrist to my advice.

Anyway, I guess I'll go back to being a shitty friend for someone who's been in my life for 20-plus years. Thanks, all. I'm out. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics