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[quote=Anonymous]When we got married DH and I discussed how to handle the Holidays. We agreed that he would choose one year if we’d go to his family, I’d choose the next if we’d go to my family, and every third year we’d focus on our family and stay home. We realized that we much prefer to spend the holidays at home, less travel, less expense, less stress etc. So this is what we do each year. We see his family for a full week every summer and occasionally throughout the year.

This works very well for us. I think you should speak to your DH about what both of you want and just focus on that.

I don’t think the sibling is selfish but it’s ok for them to want to relax and see friends and do their own thing on the holidays. Nobody wants guests forced on them.

You can’t change anyone else’s behavior but start your own traditions in your home and you’ll love it.

Also now that my in-laws are much older the dynamic has shifted from SIL draining them all the time with her childcare needs etc so SIL bring their care giver. I’m glad we live out of state! [/quote]

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