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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, a lot of people are making assumptions that are not true and I want to clear a few things up. My father had a college degree and a stable well paying job. He would not have been able to find a job in his field near the small town. Taking a lower paying job would have meant losing his benefits (which we were covered under) and obviously he wouldn't have been able to give my mother as much child support. They did not have extensive savings as they had just upgraded into a larger home, bought new furniture for that home, and bought a new family vehicle. My mother did eventually find a job, but it was very low paying, she was able to get health insurance from it though.

My father NEVER said anything bad about my mother to us, even after she started dating her high school sweetheart shortly after we moved back to her hometown. He even kept his mouth shut when I repeated stuff that she said back to him. As a 7 year old I didn't realize how much it probably hurt him, now when I look back I cringe.

I don't know what went on between my parents before the divorce, all I can say is that he was a good dad during the times when we were with him. He made me feel like I was important, and I felt like he really liked me as a person. I didn't get that feeling very often from my mother. We talked to him often on the phone and as I stated in the OP, he would travel to visit us in the small town to attend school and sporting events.

I think part of the reason why I wonder what could've been is because I was not very happy in the small town. I enjoyed being close to my grandparents and cousins, but I was bullied in elementary school and never really found a group of people I clicked with. My high school class size was very small and I just didn't feel like I fit in. I left the town as soon as I turned 18 and I was able to do that with my father's financial support. Along with paying child support, he also started giving money monthly directly to my siblings and I once we were juniors in high school.

As I said, his drinking didn't appear to get horrible until my later high school years and beginning of college. That was the first time I witnessed any drunk behavior from him and it was pretty devastating. That's why I wonder if he had depression issues, it's like he just gave up and drank himself to death.

As I said in my previous post, it was a bad day and around the anniversary of my dad's death when I posted this. I do not blame my mother for divorcing him, I truly believe that everyone deserves to be happy and obviously she wasn't happy with him. What I am upset about is being forced to live in that small town and not being able to see my father more often. I don't have the greatest relationship with my mother, but that is due to other reasons having nothing to do with my father.

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then why didn’t he fight for full custody??[/quote]

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