Reply to Sister in Moscow - should I pressure her to leave

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I just wanted to offer empathy for your situation. Everyone is criticizing your sister for not going sooner. We have a similarly complicated situation in our family, but in Hong Kong. Some left decades ago, some left during the handover, and some left 10 years ago. The ones who are still there are conflicted, and if anything, staying through the most recent changes makes it even harder to leave, not easier. I can’t explain it but I’m familiar with the mindset and it’s a constant conversation we have about cousins and aunts and uncles. We can’t talk to them directly about it anymore, which is really tough.

I do agree with others who suggested bringing the relatives over for a vacation. If that seems impossible, meet at a resort in Turkey, rent a house somewhere in the middle, anything. Even seeing them for a week or two is better than never again- but don’t say that. If nothing else, you can use the vacation to give them cash.

If there’s any situation where you can get the ILs to Canada or the US, I think you’ll find that the reality of how Russians are treated here is very different than how we talk about them politically. Reassure your SIL. I live in an area with lots of young Russian families and grandparents. It’s understood, for better or for worse, that we don’t talk about everything that’s happening.[/quote]

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