Reply to Anyone had success with an open marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"+1, I know several people in this exact marriage who are doing well. Their marriages are about the kids, companionship, shared financial goals, maybe some shared hobbies. Even when one partner would like to be having some sex, it can work, as long as that other stuff is a much higher priority to them. Sure, you could leave the marriage and have a lot more sex. But if it would mean losing your co-parent, best friend, person who knows you better than anyone, and sacrificing your finances... it's not worth it."

[b]I really don't understand how someone could be best friends in a marriage and be ok with their spouse having sex with other women or men. I just can't wrap my head around this. And how do you justify other people having affairs because they need sex but others just putting up with this? It makes no sense.[/b] I'm ok with you sleeping with others but not getting a new tennis partner? And why can't you be best friends and not in a marriage? Share finances? Shared hobbies? If you can have an open marriage for sex you can have open or shared anything.[/quote]

I am going on 3 years in a sexless marriage and it makes sense to me. You stop seeing your spouse as a sexual partner and more as a platonic friend and teammate raising kids together. The thought of my spouse having sex with someone else seems as strange as my friend doing it. I might even be like "good for you!" if it happened.

The primary way your friend is separated from your boyfriend or spouse is the sex. Without that, you are friends. Close friends, perhaps but just friends.

None of this makes sense to people in sexual marriages. Until you are in a sexless marriage, you have no clue how much it erodes your soul and your sense of attachment to your spouse.[/quote]

So then what is the need for the paper? And sexless is different than someone in a relationship with someone else. I mean why can't you just be divorced and best friends?[/quote]

Kids are 12 and 15. I'd rather be in the house with them. If in a few years or a few weeks the cost benefit feels otherwise, I can always leave. I assume this is what drives empty nest divorces.[/quote]

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