Reply to Appropriate age for boys to stop going into the locker room with their moms at the pool?

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Reply to "Appropriate age for boys to stop going into the locker room with their moms at the pool?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I have an 8-year-old boy who would be so embarrassed to change in the women's locker room with me.  I agree 8 is way too old.  I stopped around 5 and even that felt awkward, and I'd only do it if truly necessary.  The girls deserve privacy and I think both the young girls and boys would be very embarrassed to see each other changing!

However, I also get tired of moms of only young girls not being willing to stretch their imagination to the possibility of having a boy, calling them pervs (!) or otherwise not lending any empathy to the situation.  We all know that moms are often the default parent, schlepping the clothes, towels, etc. and in general we would ALL prefer our young child (male or female) not be in a room full of male strangers that we can't ourselves enter (please don't compare it to the bathroom at school with all children!)  It can be difficult to navigate when a mom and young son enter a situation like this and I can't just magically conjure my husband if he's not there or a family changing room if there's not one.  Once again I have and do work around it - because the situation is tricky doesn't mean I just expect everyone else (including my embarrassed son) to deal with it.  But it's a frustration to me when moms of girls don't understand that we are ALSO concerned for our child's safety and they may need our help just like your child does - not now that he's 8 really, but when 5 or 6 - absolutely.  The best way I have seen someone describe it is if you wouldn't send your young girl into the men's room alone for fear for their safety, why would you expect a mom to send the same age little boy?  They are young and vulnerable just like little girls!

Last - sorry for the rant -  but what is with people saying what children should and shouldn't be comfortable with at certain ages and then "insulting" them by calling them special needs if they need extra care.  My son is fairly independent, but not confident in brand new situations.  We had a situation a few weeks ago where we got to new-to-us pool for a swim meet and the only way to enter the pool was through a large locker room.  My child froze - he had never encountered this situation before because you don't have to enter through the locker room at our pool, and he just isn't a kid who feels confident in new situations like that.  He also can panic and feel turned around very easily.  We figured it out, but it rubs me the wrong way to hear people say that children who don't face EVERY situation head on and confident are somehow snowflakes.  Also anyone using special needs as an insult is terrible. [/quote]

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