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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thanks for all the feedback. I am glad to know there are others who feel uncomfortable like me in a bikini.

I understand it is me who needs to change or adapt. I want to be just like other women who are in a bikini with a drink in one hand and can confidently chat with men. I grew up in a culture where this is just not the norm.

So my question I guess really is, if this something that women just grow into it and if so, there is some hope for me. In that case maybe if I try wearing a few times I might slowly get comfortable after a while.

DH is white and is supportive of me in whatever I am comfortable. It is just as likely I am imagining things when I said checking out other women. But it how I feel.

Thanks for putting up with my rant and all the helpful suggestions![/quote]

I am an obese woman who never wears a bikini and I seriously doubt that anyone at the beach or pool is paying any attention to what I am wearing.

My husband talks to both men and women in a variety of pool attire and I don’t think he is “checking out” any of them.

If your husband is a lech, then you need to deal with that — but this really does sound like insecurity talking.  Assuming your husband loves you, he will think you look great no matter what you wear. And almost no one at the pool will care what you wear - other than perhaps a few totally obnoxious people, and who cares what they think???[/quote]

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