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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]+1 to both above posts. Look: when you join a team that is not Rec, what you year is it’s all about your DCs development. You watch and wait. Then after a while you realize that all is not quite as it seems. Let’s say, the biggest players always start. Or at U11 or U10, the kids never play different positions. Or, playing time is a serious issue (which is never ok at very young ages). You raise this to the coach and they say, I’m the coach. Not you. Or you raise to the club and they say, it is at the coach’s discretion. You could leave, but now your DC has friends. And at least the downsides are known. Who would now trust another club or coach to be honest? How do you know the difference? All most of us want is for our kids to learn, grow, and have a great time playing competitive soccer. Play in high school. Maybe college for a very few. The system seems designed to beat families down, to be honest. I should not have to talk to the coach to get my 9YO to see more than 15 minutes in a game. Or to play anything other than defense. He may not be the best on the team now, but he is also unlikely to improve much with that little time in game. So. What do you do?[/quote]

EXCELLENT points!

"What do you do?"

What we did was try a few different clubs until we found the right fit.  IF we could go back in time sure, we'd do a lot of things differently.  But the lesson for DS has been this is a journey and to enjoy every moment of it.  Embrace the grind.  W's are nice, but they don't define you.  Neither do the L's, the team/club you are on at the moment nor league they play in.  There's a book to be written once our journey is done.  The chapter on personal character lessons learned will be huge.   We stress that he's going to hear a thousand "No's" before or if he ever get's a yes...  DS has been VERY dedicated to doing the extra work outside club training.  We tried a private trainer and quickly saw that wasn't $ustainable.  He's taken drills and ideas from coaches, YouTube, etc. That's been the key to his climb through the ranks.  As a highschooler he's done a ton of trials to include MUCH higher level clubs in/outside the area.  It's nice to see how he stacks up and gain comfort in the unfamiliar and potentially stressful tryout environment.  [/quote]

Same thing we have done with our sons.  My HS kid can now role into tryouts anywhere confident.  He is now seeing the fruits of that grit and hard work pay off.  He handled some pretty sh*tty situations much better than I would have at his young ages and didn't let it get him down.  Along the way, I made sure to find mentors for him that truly believed in him.  One happened to be the U9 Coach his first year of travel.  He trained with him for years after they both left the Club and he left Coaching completely.  He has been a great role model all of these years and could always make him feel better about a lot of the nonsense that goes on in travel soccer.  There are good people in this sport.[/quote]

One thing I always did for my son was to show how things that seemed crappy at the time, ultimately ended up making him a much better player because it forced him to go find other options. Every.single.one of those times were for the better.  He ended up in better situations and grew more as a player and got what he needed in that point in time.  Adversity can be very good for growth and mental toughness.  Those are truly great life lessons.[/quote]

There is something immensely satisfying in proving people wrong.[/quote]

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