Reply to Wrong to not allow my teen DD to wear certain clothes

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]Women/girls will be objectified no matter what they wear. It's not about 'provocative clothing' or them 'asking for it', it is about a world where men/boys feels comfortable in objectifying women/girls. Should we let them dictate our choice in clothing because they choose not to control themselves? I'm not talking about wearing a crop top/short shorts to church or the office (which would be inappropriate) but if for day-to-day, why should my DD choose to dress for men rather than for herself?[/quote]

But is she really dressing for herself?  Or has she (like most of us) internalized the message that our fashion choices should be dictated by what is attractive to men?  I hear the argument all the time that sexually provocative clothes are empowering or an expression of a girl's/woman's freedom, and I don't buy it.  When I wore short/tight clothes when I was younger, it was because I was insecure that I was pretty enough and wanted attention.  I think if we're honest, that's exactly why girls still wear these clothes.[/quote]

Disagree. Lots of lesbians and asexual people wear "revealing" clothes. It is hard to parse out exactly why an individual wears what they wear, but I think it's just as likely as not that it's not about men.

I do agree that lots of girls and women have that internalized message, but I think it's better to talk about that message in terms of self-worth and how attention from men is totally useless, not by restricting clothing.

That said, I do restrict what my daughter wears to school, just because I think we should dress for the occasion. I don't think asking a girl to wear a longer shirt if she is going to wear shorter shorts is different from asking a man to wear a suit and tie to court.[/quote]

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