Reply to Does SAHM make a difference during infant years?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Does SAHM make a difference during infant years? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]One thing that influenced my decision to SAH was that on my maternity leave I was around nannies a lot and many of them were mediocre at best[b]. I remember going to story times at the library and the majority of nannies just ignored the kids (and the people from the library) and stared at their phones or chatted with one another, rather than engage with the kids during the story time. Same at parks and playgrounds. [/b]It wasn’t everyone — there were some engaged nannies. But most were bored and inattentive.

When I read the posts on here but everyone’s amazing nannies... I’m sure some people really did have great nannies who engaged your children and cared for them in a really attentive way. But IME that’s not how most nannies are. It was very obvious to me that I was way more focused on my child’s well being than most of the nannies I encountered were on that of the kids they were with. And particularly for children under 18 months (at which point they are fully mobile and not only can handle more independence but need it) there’s no question that a child benefits from being with a truly living and attentive caregiver.

I will say that the most engaged caregivers I encountered during my leave and SAHM days were the grandmas. Even more than most moms, who also get bored and stare at their phones a lot. If that’s an option for you, I’d seize it![/quote]

I have the opposite take on this.  I don’t think the SAHMs or nannies who smother kids when they are out are doing the kids a favor.  The entire point of going to story time is for the librarian to read a story and the kids to see other kids.  The point of the playground is for kids to explore and  to play with other kids.  It’s NOT for parents to play with their kids.  The type of parent you seem to admire is the type who ends up with a five year old who can’t leave mommy without crying.  It isn’t healthy and is selfish of the moms.

It’s a new parenting style to completely 100% focus on your child and have absolutely nothing else going on.  In the past, women had chores to do and other children to tend to.  They rarely spent so much time focusing on one child and entertaining them.  Kids who grow up in an environment where the mom is 100% focused on the child and nothing else are not doing their child any favors.

Judge away at the nannies who sit on the bench at the playground.   But those kids are the ones who end up normal well adjusted kids.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics