Reply to I know this is completely unethical

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a mom who had a kid with a man I shouldn't have despite using BC.  My kids are now in HS.  I love them, but I wish I had loved myself enough to leave and have a baby on my own or in a healthy relationship.  And I wish I had loved them enough to choose more wisely about their father and family.

You think that you can be everything to them.  You can't.   You also can't make up for having a crappy dad.  Yes, my kids are OK, and I am delighted to have them.  But, after 2 decades I realize that I could have had an equally delightful set of kids on my own without all the headaches and heartaches caused by a crappy abusive dad.  And, they deserved a far better father or at least no father at all rather than the crappy unreliable dad that they got that makes them feel less than.

There is no way to have this child without them eventually finding out what you did.  The child may be OK with what you chose but if not you may lose them forever.

It is also extremely unlikely that your abusive partner will leave you alone if he figures this out.  You will not fare well in court if he comes after you, even if you have documentation of abuse.

Love yourself and your future kids enough to have an abortion, get out of this abusive situation and start over with a sperm donor.  I know you think you are "too old," but if you had a pregnancy within 6 months while using condoms, then you are capable of getting pregnant at your age without great difficulty.

I am telling you what I wish someone had told me and what I would tell my own daughter. [/quote]

We weren't using condoms when I got pregnant. It's not just my age there's health stuff I don't want to go into. Thank you for the advice but for me personally abortion is not an option. [/quote]

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