Reply to Finding the birth mother in a closed adoption from Eastern Europe

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP: the agency had no part in locating our daughter. They only facilitated the background checks so that we could adopt. we found my daughter through a contact we made in her birth country. He died a few years ago.

My daughter's birth mother would be in her early 40s today. Of course, we are going on the assumption she is living in the same country when she could have moved on. And no idea of a married name. Sometimes I feel like we are chasing air.

Not an easy situation. [/quote]

As a practical matter, starting with contacts of your contact and the adoption agency personnel would be the best start. Frankly, I think you could do some of this yourself with a translator. That might also give you and your daughter a good idea of the attitude of the community in welcoming an adoptee back. Would you consider going yourself and getting a lay of the land?

On a personal/emotional level, I think your daughter should probably get some counseling on how to deal with a variety of outcomes - complete lack of information, rejection, a happy reunion, and unhappy reunion, etc.
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