Reply to Are single people in their thirties really the “undesirables”?

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Reply to "Are single people in their thirties really the “undesirables”?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think marrying too early is a bad idea...you don't really know yourself in your 20s. Marrying in your 30s (women) and 30s early 40s (men) in DC area or any metropolitan area is fine. I didn't get married until 39...hubs is a few years older.[/quote]

A norm around getting married that late is one with fewer kids, a lot more infertility/birth defects, and kids barely meeting their grandparents. Both extended adolescence and this idea that you should have yourself entirely figured out before getting married, as opposed to continuing to do that work within your marriage, are choices that cultures make. And not good ones. If you don't have yourself together enough to make a commitment until you're much older than is optimal for having kids -- well, that happens sometimes, but it's something to aspire to. [/quote]

You seem obsessed with kids.  Many of us have a life and don’t define ourselves by our children or motherhood.  [/quote]

That's such a narcissistic frame to see this. "How you define yourself"? Think about what kind of culture you want to live in and work toward it. If that culture is one where people like you don't reproduce because it's so important that you spend your 20s and 30s figuring out who you are, then have at it. [/quote]

That's exactly the culture I want for my daughter. I want her to be independent and make her own decisions, rather than feeling pressured to settle down early like I was. I'd rather she be happy than have a certain # of kids.

Are there really people out there who just want their children to get married and reproduce as young as possible? What about their happiness? This totally boggles my mind...[/quote]

+1. Is PP 70+? Their thinking is so archaic.[/quote]

Brunch hating poster is an incel. He describes the world based on a show that went off the air 15+ years ago. You can always tell these guys don't have any women in their life because their only reference to what "women do" is based on an old TV show. He yearns for the time when women were forced to be dependent on men and when he didn't have to compete in the workforce with women who are better than him. So he spends his time online trying to scare women, except he doesn't get that we're women and know women so his tales of woe based on an old show doesn't really scare us.

Maybe he could lose his virginity if women were scared to settle down ASAP. Oh well, another man born in the wrong decade who simply can't adapt. [/quote]

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