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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is why anxious people shouldn't reproduce.[/quote]

Ouch!! Just curious, am I the only one disturbed by this ignorant comment?? As a forum are we ok with this type of post? Mental health issues are not something to joke about. Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health concern in the United States. You are the sad sad reason why people are ashamed to seek treatment for mental health disorders. Why would you say something so mean and ignorant? Would you like to apologize? [/quote]

I am quite shocked by the number of harsh responses. As if "I ate shit before, now you have to suck it up and eat shit too". Why everyone is so bitter?

SO WHAT? that some of you heard the most distressing news about baby dying in your belly all by yourself? Wouldn't be nice to have your husband next to you holding your hand and sharing the pain?
Does it mean that you wish all other women to go through that experience??

SO WHAT that your husband couldn't (or wouldn't) come to appointments with you. Some are busy or not that involved, but I yet to meet a women who would honestly say she wouldn't love him to willingly be there. If you had to deal with all this all by yourself, again - doesn't mean others have to do so! It is so great that her husband is excited and wanting to be there - you need to encourage and congratulate them@

SO WHAT that OP is anxious. Isn't normal part of FTM process? Saying that she has no right for such feeling is a straight path to depression. It is so sad to read this..

***
I had many many traumatic events in my life. Some people wonder why I didn't kill myself hearing even a part of it. But none of that would make me wish another person to go through the same shit I went though and to "grow up". I wish no one had to grow up and be naive and happy as long as they can..

My husband wasn't with me on that appointment when I learned my baby passed away at 38w. I lived after as you can see but that it not the reason to say: "You will be fine, I had it so you suck it up too". It would be much much easier if he were there right away. And it was the 2nd appointment he missed during whole pregnancy. We both survived somehow.

And I understand desire to have a husband nearby during those appointments - not only because of anxiety but also because of early involvement raises great dad. YES. A dad is not born overnight (nor like a mother), we are slowly becoming them. The sooner the guy starts to be involved in the process the earlier and better father he will become. Women who think otherwise simply don't have that option for some reason (let's be kind and sympathetic to them) - they can't change their husbands and have to change their perception of reality by saying "You don't need him... all the women for centuries did it fine.. I did it fine and it is even better without him.."

OP - I wish you great healthy pregnancy! Covid sucks in many different forms for us all. Just need to pick your battles.[/quote]

Pretty sure most ppl are reacting to op thinking about legal action [/quote]

I didn’t read this as her considering legal action. I thought she was genuinely asking if a father has rights to his unborn child. Fair question I think...as a society, we shame our men for not being involved, not taking on an active role in parenting, not doing “as much as mom.” Here’s a father who WANTS to take an active role from the very beginning with HIS child-and I think he should have SOME legal right to do so. Not saying anyone should sue the doctors office-and I don’t think OP was saying that either. But at minimum, mothers should be allowed to sign shared rights over to the father if they choose to. [/quote]

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