Reply to Do I have a right to be upset with my 25 year old DD?

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Reply to "Do I have a right to be upset with my 25 year old DD?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I guess I’m surprised at the vitriol toward OP. I don’t sense a lot of these PPs value a connection with the elder members in their family or community. Because the answers are entirely focused on the (very valid) fact that OP’s DD is an adult with the right to make her own choices, without acknowledging or understanding OP’s feelings of disappointment. Comments like “85 year old birthday parties are a bore” reflect that this is not the audience for OP’s query.

I get it, OP. But I also agree that you can’t make demands on your adult daughter. When I was 25 I was so wrapped up in my own dramatic life and didn’t spend as much time with my dying grandmother, who I had been very close to throughout my life. I miss her every day and wish I had done things differently, but those insights and relocations came later, with maturity and more years of life under my belt.

So you have the right to feel upset and disappointed, but that’s something for you to manage on your own. You were present, and you celebrated your mother on that day with extended family. Your DD has to live her own life, and deal with the consequences of her decisions.

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