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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]I was hoping that by seeing how much they’ve uprooted my life and made me miserable, they’d concede to outside help[/quote]

You CAN NOT be afraid of Mommy and Daddy not liking you. You have power over your own life.[/quote]

Seriously, this is absurd.  Middle-aged adults are letting their parents run their lives.  [/quote]

It's not absurd. These are difficult conversations and some of us are wracked with guilt at the thought of our parents moving to facilities or institutions where we don't know how the care will be. Sometimes these responsibilities also sneak up on you a bit; you start out by handling a few things and the list keeps growing. OR, in many cases, a parent has a fall or illness and you care for them during that time and, guess what? They don't get better or they never get back to the level they were before the event. All of a sudden you realize that you are still doing everything and the parent has gotten comfortable with the care they're getting. It's not simple or easy.[/quote]

The PP is waiting outside her parents' room, hoping they'll recognize she's miserable.  If they don't, she'll . . . what, continue to make her life subservient to theirs?  It is absurd.  People make decisions for themselves, not other grown adults.  If parents want to age in place, that's their choice, but they do *not* get to dictate the level of help they get from their kids.  Well, I guess they do, if they have raised kids who are too scared or otherwise cowed by them to stand up to them.

I sincerely hope my kids have more self-respect and backbone than this.  [/quote]

You are cherry picking the comment. The PP said her parents had agreed to make a different plan by February 14 but are showing no signs of sticking to the agreed on date. Now she is in a position where she has to be the bad guy and pull the plug. They don't know it but older people often become very self-absorbed and lose their ability to see how their situation is affecting others around them.

I sincerely hope that you retain all of your faculties until you die, but please don't lose your compassion for CAREGIVERS who have to make difficult choices about their loved ones.[/quote]

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