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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had children not "caregivers". Of course my grown children are going to be free to live their lives.  Visit me - yes.  But put aside their own responsibilities to themselves, their spouse, their children, their employer to care for me? No way.

I am going to be sure to write that out, date it and sign it. I'll give each of my kids a copy of what I've written while I'm of sound mind and body - when it's ME talking.

There are far worse things in life then not getting perfect care in your old age.[/quote]

This is so, painfully, naive.  Have you never had an elderly relative?

If what you wrote above were possible, my husband and I certainly would have done so, as would my mother and his mother, but it's not possible.  Even if you have oodles of money (which they do), live in assisted living facilities (which they do), have financial people and caregivers and support systems (which they do) and are of sound mind (one is, one isn't) managing the old ladies is a constant stream of duties big and small.

I wish you the best, I really do, but to write something like you wrote above requires an optimistic streak that is crossing the border into arrogance.    [/quote]

Yes I have dealt with elderly relatives.  And my statement stands.  There are worse things than an adult child not dropping everything and rushing to their elderly parent's side at the first sign of trouble.  In fact, as a parent myself, the worst thing would be that my own adult children's health, happiness and personal freedom would suffer trying to look out for me and appease me in my old age.

I have seen some great examples of older people who simply suck it up and dealing with it. Maybe I will write myself a note that I can read later on if or when I need to be reminded of my own wishes. [/quote]

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