Reply to How to deal with my mother's absolutely appaling Christmas idea?

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm the person who received the scale for Christmas along with a public weigh-in.  I've been thinking about this and what's really disturbing about the grandma's behavior here is it's pretty much PREMEDITATED cruelty -- like it was with my mom.
This scenario involves:
1.  Thinking up a way to humiliate the person struggling with their weight
2.  Taking the time to go to the store to purchase the mean gift
3.  Wrapping the mean gift
4.  putting the mean gift under the tree
5.  LIkely nudging the person to open the mean gift -- etc.

There are NUMEROUS steps in this sequence in which any rational sane person would kind of realize "Wow, I"m about to do a really shitty thing."  This isn't an impulse.  It isn't a one off.  It is a long term pattern of premeditated cruelty.  
It's hard to make the argument that "this person is actually pretty great except s/he did this one shitty thing."  It's the kind of thing that actually makes you a shitty person.

I still see my mom occasionally but I don't trust her.  I don't trust her with my feelings, I don't trust her with my plans.  I don't reveal ANYTHING to her EVER.

YOu might want to think about the relationship you have overall with your mom "aside form the fact that she did this one shitty thing."  Is it really just the one shitty thing?[/quote]

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