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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, your mother sounds a lot like my MIL. My FIL is still alive and incredibly capable despite being in his late 80s. He does every.single.thing for her, even sleeps on the floor at her command because she won't have him in the same bed or in a separate room. But even he is (FINALLY!) starting to get fed up and it's not pretty.[/quote]

Wait, what? Your FIL sleeps on the floor? WTF? Why the heck does he agree to that?? At the very least why not move two beds into the bedroom? I would LOVE you to start your own thread and talk more about what’s going on there and what the dynamics are!! You said he’s starting to get fed up? What’s happening and what’s he doing?? How do you and your spouse deal with it all?

OP, you can get aides for $25/hour or less. I’m curious, and sorry if you already said, but what’s your own life like? Partner, kids, friends, hobbies, etc.? You are in a very tough position and you have my sympathy.  I posted before but I’ll say it again: you should NOT spend your own retirement money to support your mother. I’m surprised your sister thinks it’s reasonable for you to risk being in a crappy nursing home in sacrifice to your mother’s demands.  And at some point the alternate weekends will be too burdensome. Do you all live in the same town?[/quote]

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