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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ugh, this is my mother too. She was a quasi-successful professional when I was a kid. Corporate law and then in house. Far from a superstar, but had a job that paid well and specific bankable expertise.

When I got to HSish age, she started her own practice — I still don’t know if she got forced out or just didn’t like the grind/had plenty of money from child support (I think the latter). She did OK and had plenty of child support and savings and owned our home, so not negative cash flow at least.

When I was just post-college, she decided to switch careers entirely and go back to school. One possible career path of new degree was related to law (how she justified it), while another wasn’t at all (what I think her real plan was). She spent a fair amount to go back for this new multi year degree, graduated with honors from a pretty good school... but was ultimately a 60 year old in school/competition for jobs with 20 and 30 somethings. She applied for some dream jobs afterwards but didn’t actually apply for the kind of job she had an actual chance of getting. Just never bothered. So essentially retired... but even worse than OP, retire after spend $100K on a totally unnecessary degree.

Anyway, I doubt OP is a troll and I think she’s right to be concerned.

Now she complains about money all the time and is burning through her savings. DH and I do pretty well, but are Feds with multiple kids, expensive child care and a large mortgage .. no way we can cover her bizarro decisions. At least she finally reached social security age. It was all so badly thought out though... and, on top of everything else, I think she’s no
w bored and bitter. Not that she offers childcare help to us. [/quote]

Dp. Why do you think your mother owes you childcare?  They are your kids yo raise and it doesn't sound very appealing after raising your own kids.  Would you ever think of asking or asuming a man would want to raise your kids? Assuming your swap genders in your story.  It says a lot about how little you value your mom's time.  [/quote]

I don't think she owes it to us. At all. (We don't even live in the same city, so I would definitely not be talking about anything ongoing/regular.) But I think she is totally bored and has nothing to do... and still doesn't offer to come visit (comes maybe 3-4x/year; it's a 2 hour drive and she's in perfectly good health) or help with the kids. She does have many (many!) opinions about how we should raise our kids though. Anyway, it was just an aside. As for the rest of your assumptions... my dad actually visits and watches our kids at least occasionally (despite having a job). And my in laws are great![/quote]

Np I get it. My parents live nearby and are “so bored”. And they equally are upset that their grandkids are in daycare and they don’t see them enough. I suggest they take the kids out on half days and to playgrounds or shopping and they are so offended. How dare I suggest they provide childcare??? But on my precious weekends they’re upset they can’t take the kids by themselves. Why?!? I only get weekends. They could see the kids any time[/quote]

Im the pp you responded to.  I can only respond to information you provide.  Ie my mom is bored but doesnt want to babysit my kids.  Perhaps she is bored but, obviously doesnt want to provide child care.  Im assuming she did this for you and your father did not? Perhaps that is why it is novel to  him?You can be bored and find taking care of children also boring.[/quote]

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