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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP why aren’t you focusing your efforts on dealing with the trauma he must feel when your brother abandoned him?[/quote]

And why are you so sure that this man, who knows you won't confront the real issue head on and didnt when he was younger and more vulnerable, isn't perfectly aware but just not confiding in you.

I hide behind cluelessness sometimes with my own family. Lying to give yourself space and privacy? all the time.[/quote]

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He’s letting this take up as much real estate in his head as he took in the person who abandoned him, back when he needed him the most.

Who was there to guide him when he was the biracial or black kid kid in T-ball, on the math team, or doing college rowing? Where were you when he was the only biracial kid in his “whitewashed” neighbourhood? Where were yu when his MIL wouldn’t accept him?

Your nephew probably knows more racism than you know, because he doesn’t fit any specific mold. He’s not white, and he’s not black. The awesome things is, he’s obviously found a life where he is happy, accepted, and comfortable. You don’t need to educate him now: he knows already and has decided to let it roll off him. He’s doing just fine without your intervention.[/quote]
How do you know he was abandoned. All OP says was the dad was not in his life, you have no idea why.[/quote]

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