Reply to First X-Mas as blended family off to terrible start

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]FWIW, older men don't really want to spend time with their grandkids based on my observations. Even if he and OP hadnt married, it wouldn't mean that the 29yo DD acquired a male Mary Poppins for her brood. Their resentment about less time for the grandkids doesnt make sense. Older men see their grandkids, coo over them for an hour and give them back. They are not playing grandma.[/quote]

But this older man seems to feel it is very important that all his kids and grandkids appear for Christmas. If they come and he isn’t spending time with them, that’s something they (kids and gramps) need to work out, without new grandma going anywhere near it.

New grandma can: make the kids and grandkids welcome in her home. Which it seems she is trying to Maybe not 17 at once though.  But maybe welcome visits on one of the first kids and their kid (s) at a time. And while they visit, give gramps space to spend time with the grandkids if he chooses.  Which means not guilt tripping him if he takes his grandchildren to a movie, and not her kid or grandkids. If he chooses not to, he needs to work that out with the kids. It also means letting him visit his kids sometimes one on one.  And not begrudging the time away from Family 2. [/quote]

Why are you convinced that OP has been guilt tripping her husband? Stop projecting! [/quote]

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