Reply to SIL’s infertility issues

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You sound like you’ve never dealt with infertility or loss.  It is a profoundly gut-wrenching sort of misery. [b]It infiltrates almost every waking moment.  It is so bad that some women get anxiety attacks just being in the same building as a baby or a pregnant woman. [/b] It’s not that your brother and SIL didn’t want to be happy for you.  She probably agonized over every single event she didn’t attend wondering if it was better to risk having a meltdown in front of you (and then having to explain her long saga of infertility) or not attend and miss out on the possibility of wonderful new relationships.  Instead of being annoyed, try to have some compassion for them and be thankful you will never have to know the horrible pain they are suffering. [/quote]

So true.  I remember feeling like I wasn't allowed into Babies R Us or any other type of baby store.  It felt like some super-special secret kind of club that I was not allowed in.  When I got an invitation to a baby shower, I felt like red alarms would blare off as I walked through the automated doors like, "Sterile!!! Lady not allowed!  Doesn't belong here!!"  I crept in, grabbed something from the list, went through checkout and mumbled, "NO,' when I was asked if I was part of their frequent customers or whatever it is, wrapped it with the free wrapping paper behind the check-out lines, and got the heck outta dodge.  My breathing and heart rate slowed, and my palms dried from their sweatiness, the further I got from that store.

We went through everything IF related (timed intercourse, clomid, IUS, injectables, IVF, FETs, etc.  Nothing covered by insurance so we were all self-pay.  Have now adopted two and I am finally a member of the "club" again.   You just get to a point where goin to child-centered events seems insane.  [/quote]

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