Reply to Hosting step-grandson for two weeks- how to deal with food fussiness

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Good grief, is this how you people act when adult visitors come to your home?

[b]"Well, I know Paul hates fish, but that's not an ALLERGY, just a preference. I'm going to make salmon. And I know Mary doesn't eat carbs, but it's not like she's ALLERGIC, it's just vanity. We'll have orzo as the side!"[/b]

My dad is a very meat-and-potatoes eater. My husband and I are more adventurous. But when my dad comes to visit, I downshift a bit. I don't see his visit to my home as an opportunity to cast his preferences as a moral failure, and teach him a lesson.[/quote]

Neither are examples of picky eating. It's just normal preferences. Paul may not like fish but maybe he likes other seafood. And there's probably other proteins that he'll eat. There are probably multiple preparations of different proteins that he'll eat. Mary doesn't eat carbs, that's okay. But that shouldn't prevent other people from eating carbs. She should just refrain from eating the carbs that are being served to the other dinner guests.

Picky eaters have an extremely limited list of foods that have be prepared in specific ways. They will only eat that and nothing else. [/quote]

You really don't need to lecture me about picky eaters. My father, brother and cousin are all very picky. Yes, it can make hosting a bit of a challenge. For large-scale events, like holidays, I make what most people like and know that they can fend for themselves. But when they are overnight guests in my home, yes I do factor in their preferences and pickiness, because I want them to be comfortable and have a great time. Again, I don't see my role as hostess as needing to correct their quirks or shame them into eating. They are my guests--I make reasonable accommodations for them.

Would it really be that hard for OP to do a store-bought rotisserie chicken, a vegetable side and a starch, and keep those items separate? Would it really be so incredibly taxing to get a pizza--a decent one from, say, Wegmans, doesn't have to be frozen--and heat it up along with a green salad and maybe some fruit? For a 12-year-old?

Isn't the point for the kid to have a good time with grandpa? This isn't rehab, right? It's not scare 'em straight sleepaway camp.[/quote]

Maybe this is just a difference in perspective. If I'm a guest in someone else's home, I don't want to impose on them. I don't expect them to go out of their way and change their dinner routine for me. If someone is kind enough to host me and cook a meal for me, I'm going to eat that meal and be grateful even if the food is not my favorite. For example, one of my big food pet peeves is overcooked dried meat. My dad, otoh, is paranoid about under cooked meat and likes everything super well-done. So whenever I eat any sort meat at my parents' home, it's extra dead. And so, I may stick to the sides and eat a little meat to be polite but I'm not going to tell my dad how to cook in his own house. Part of becoming an adult is learning that different people do things differently. So when you're at their house, you respect how they do things . No one is entitled to have the world cater to them.[/quote]

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