Reply to Working partners, do you resent your non-working spouse?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Wrong!!!! I could stay at home and do nothing if I wanted to. I took my time going to school, getting a PhD, looking for a job, etc. I am lucky to have enough family money where I did not NEED to work so I waited until I found something I really liked. I am married and have 2 kids so even if I did not work and kept my FT nanny, I would still have something to do and things to take care of (volunteering at the kids’ school, enriching activities for the weekend, etc), but I would feel useless and soooo bored. Unless you two (PP and OP) are at home studying, writing books, or becoming experts at something, I could never imagine living in your emptiness. Again, I work because I want to and not because I need to.[/quote]

Awesome, I'm glad your work is so fulfilling and that you had the fortune to be able to find something to do that you love.  Now imagine if that thing you love doing didn't provide you with a paycheck. That's what my life is like, and how I imagine OP's.  The only difference is that the thing you choose to do for a stimulating life involves getting paid for it.  Ours doesn't.  [/quote]

No, my work has a purpose. Taking care of an empty house is NOT a purpose. If you were volunteering several days a week and your work had a purpose, then yes, I agree. But if you do nothing purposeful other than “how many shows should I watch today” or “which gym class should I take at the gym”, then your day to day life has no purpose. But please tell what is your purpose. My work involves research and the purpose of my work is to eradicate world poverty. Also, I have two kids and I am trying (to the best of my ability) to give them a happy life and teaching my daughters that even if they will never NEED to work, they can still contribute by doing something meaningful that is not clean up after their husband 30 minutes of everyday.[/quote]

What you need/want may be different than other.  You enjoy working.  Many of us do not enjoy it.  My mom worked, I don't.  I don't think either way it is a big deal for daughters and you are overthinking it.  You have a full-time housekeeper/nanny.  Many of us don't have enough to cover that with our income so it makes no sense to work.  Once you are out of work, its hard to get back in at the same income to make it worth it.  As we get older, many of us have elderly family members who need assistance or our own health issues.  You sound like you aren't teaching your kids what you think you are if you have someone paid to do everything.  Part of contributing to your family is taking them to the doctor, cleaning the house, cooking, shopping and more.  What example do you set by paying someone especially if they aren't as wealthy as you.[/quote]

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