Reply to Rant re DH's family

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[quote=Anonymous]OP you can complain for another 20 years, but to make any progress, you have to figure out just what it is you really want, and then ask yourself if it is reasonable to pursue.

Your DH or his family can pay you back, but remember what your family gained by paying off his loans early -- your family saved all the interest over the lifetime of those loans. You were able to buy a house sooner than you may have otherwise, so you probably paid less for it than if you had to wait while DH paid down his loans.  You also have more appreciation in value in that house over time. Your DH may eventually get an inheritance from his family. You also have a happy marriage and a happy DH.  Those things may not come with a dollar value, but ask yourself what the cost to you would be if you did not have those.

You can count all the dollars rolling back into your bank account, but maybe that will cause your DH to turn away from you.  How painful would it be to have a less devoted husband and how much could a divorce cost you?  A wealthier husband or different set of in laws would not have guaranteed a happier, easier or more successful for you.

It seems like you think you would've had The Perfect Life if you didn't have to pay off your DH's loans or had The Perfect Inlaws.  But there is no such thing.  There are always tradeoffs and we all have to do the best we can with what we've got.  Count your blessings and let the rest go.  [/quote]

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