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[quote=Anonymous]To: The Trevor Barrett Project

From: Heather, Choice Communications

Subject: Your Turn!

Hey Trevor!

What a FAB week for you, amiright? Super big congratulations on This Changes Everything moving up on the Amazon bestseller list. Woo hoo!

Side note: Love, love, love the cover shot! Super happy you went with the humble, "Aw shucks, I'm just one of the guys" gazing down at your hands pose" versus "Naughty baby biting his fingey shot". They're both so...dopey...as you would say, Trev, but I'm always a fan of switching things up. But, if you'd have opted for the fingey biting standby, I'd still give you affirmations and head pats because, after all, that's what you pay me - albeit not very much - for.

Also want to ever-so-gently remind you that you haven't X-posted Jane's book announcement on your socials. I know you're incredibly busy with your word shirt biz - ADORE the Childless Cat Lady line - and your...um...long-form...political posts but according to the agreed-upon timeline in the amended contract for reciprocal services between you and Jane (see page 36, para. seven) you've only got another day-and-a-half to post Jane's book announcement. That tell-all is going to be a DOOZIE!

Also reminding you that under your current budget plan with Choice Communications, we don't provide caption writing services but the linked Google Doc provides you with some suggested adjectives to use that should make getting this posted super duper simple for you. After all, you're a writer. Or, if you're short on time, just go with your usual standbys of dopey and real, and then just throw in something about how Jane sees people and we'll call it good.

One quick thing, she does ask that you not refer to her as Jane Leonora Kringleschmitz. I know that's kind of your thing on the so-very-rare occasions you mention Jane on the 'gram but we've asked that you please avoid confusion by listing her by her professional name.

I've attached your current contract for reference as well as an updated pie chart, updated bar graph, and updated Venn diagram on your social media growth and engagement boost that we've attributed to your situationship with Jane. Happy to set up a call if you have questions!

I SO appreciate it, Trev!

xoxoxox

Heather

P.S. Next time you want to post about the upcoming presidential election, go ahead and send us a draft beforehand. We can maybe give it a little dust-off before you send an unedited word parfait out there for public consumption. No charge, that one's on me.

To: Heather, Choice Communications

From: The Trevor Barrett Project
RE: Your Turn!

Yo, Heather what up?

Can I be real witchyou for a minute? It's DOPE, not dopey. As my publicist and a member of my team, it's important that I feel safe when we're communicating and if you're going to misappropriate my speech patterns and word choices, I don't feel safe as a theater-loving straight-presenting vegetarian Black Man in America.

As far as the X-posting goes, I really need you to give me some space. I did Iceland. Iceland, for crying out loud! They don't even have black people in Iceland, can you imagine how traumatic it was for me, a six-foot-two black man to walk around with a gaggle of white folk for almost five days? I am still recovering.

I am, after all, a cancer survivor and in this stressful election season, I need to protect my peace, yo. It's nuanced. Complicated.
 
I also did the U.S. Open thing with her and despite my better judgment, made that comment about eating Jane's meat, which was traumatic for me on several levels. Can a brotha get a break with the X-posting?

I saw 11 Make America Great Again yard signs yesterday and when I was at in line at Publix to buy my cheese curls and M&Ms for midnight snacking, someone in line behind me kept saying CAM-AH-LA instead of COMMA-LAH and only one person recognized me, so I'm kind of going through it, you know what I'm sayin'?

Nuanced. Complicated.

Jane Leonora Kringleschmitz can just hold her horses for a hot minute, aight? I happen to know she's got a healthy supply of Black Box Pinot Grigio on hand and she's fine in her porch swing until I can get in the right headspace to make this happen.

Thanks, Heather. You're my people.

Love,
Trevor
Best Selling Author, Activist, Black Thunder[/quote]

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