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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It’s a leap of faith to quit and SAHP.

I recently did it but it took me 3 years to pull the trigger, and I was thinking about it 2 years before then.

I have three kids and honestly, if you make a decent salary, you can pay for good quality childcare when they are young. I didn’t mind leaving them when they were babies/young toddlers, as I felt like they were well cared for while I worked, and doing really well. As they entered elementary school, it actually got harder to find good quality childcare - we tried a nanny/housekeeper position, tried aftercare, and I felt like I wanted to be more involved in their lives than I was by not getting home until 5 or 6 pm.

When my youngest hit elementary school and nothing got any easier, I started thinking seriously about quitting. balancing work and home life was a constant challenge - I had advanced in my career, which meant more flexibility but also more responsibility. So I could take a sick day, but the hours needed to be made up to get the work done. I could make it all work but it felt like I was constantly either shortchanging my kids or shortchanging my job. It was a bad feeling, but I really liked my job and had never imagined myself being a sAHp. It also felt like I was a “quitter” since I had gotten through the early childhood years, but it just felt like I was too busy to really enjoy either working or parenting.

And of course you can’t talk about SAHP without talking about money.  I made about $120k when my first was born and about $210k when I quit 11 years later. My DH made slightly more than me when we had DC1 and made 10X more than me, so by the time I was thinking about stopping work, my financial contribution was no longer critical to the finances of our family. And while I really struggled internally with depending on my DH financially, I decide to reframe and be grateful that he makes enough that I am able to choose — he would be making the same wether I kept working or not.

It’s only been a few months now that I’m home, and I am really enjoying it. It took a bit to get into a routine, and set goals and a schedule for myself, but I’m pretty happy making the adjustment. My DH continues to be supportive, I’ve finally gotten to be a parent volunteer at my kids school, and I am getting regular exercise. I do see myself working again at some point, but not for many more years and it will be a new career - I’m calling myself retired from my last one. [/quote]

Your husband’s salary went from $140K to $2.1M in 11 years? Was he an entry level investment banker when you had DC1 and then a portfolio manager when you decided to quit 11 years later?

I agree with the PP who said that this is a choice that comes down to many variables that are unique to each person and family: number of children, overall difficulty of children, spacing of children, types of activities children are in, the community you are in and the expectations put upon parents and children, if you have family money or a solid fall back plan in the case of divorce, your household income without one working parent, your savings and general financial position, your enjoyment of your work, your enjoyment of taking care of household and childcare tasks, your ability to get either paid or unpaid childcare help, the state of your marriage, the state of your spouse’s job and the industry they work in. [/quote]

Yeah, I was with the first PP until she said her husband now make $2.1 million.  I mean, what else is really relevant after that?[/quote]

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