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[quote=Anonymous]My mother suffers from extreme anxiety and abandonment issues as well and can be insufferable as a result. 
My story is similar in that I am recovering from surgery and she very kindly swooped down to take care of me. Actually my father is taking of me, while she stresses and hovers and verbalizes nonsense constantly. 
Also I realized she pulled her usual green-eyed monster act when she couldn't physically be there for the surgery and was incensed that my best friend would be there for me - jealous, as usual, just like when I was a child and she refused all playdates and banned me from leaving the house to see friends.

I remind myself that my father is greatly helping, and my mother's presence is necessary for that to happen, because they are inseparable.
I remind myself that in her own twisted way she loves me, even when she tries to isolate me from my friends and other members of my family (even now, at 36, she tries to decline invitations for me). 
I remind myself she cannot help being who she is.

So I have no advice, OP, but sympathy. Do your best to love her but keep her at arms' length.[/quote]

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