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[quote=Anonymous]My parents have always been contentious people, but as they approach 70. it's become worse. They love to see their grandchildren, but whenever they visit, they start arguments in my home. DH and I do I best to keep our home pleasant for our kids and we're just not people who yell over politics and religion. We like the atmosphere we have but when my parents show up, forget it. They just don't know how to act. My mother is pretty much the kind of person who will start a tiff over anything, even the weather. She's rather be right than keep the peace.

The last time they visited we ended up in a huge fight with them. They pretty much are clueless about their behavior and immediately told us they wanted to visit next month for a long weekend. They live a few hours away; I wish they lived a few continents away.

I've tried to tell them to dial it back, but their answer is more or less, this is who we are, and we love you and the kids, so deal with it. They think being wonderful, generous grandparents trumps all.

One reason I can't stand their visits is because they bring back the lousy parts of my childhood. When I was a kid, they yelled a lot. These people don't know how not to yell. My father was always shouting over everyone, my mother was always shouting back and insulting him, me, my brother, etc. Frankly, their behavior was often, and still is, classless. My mother's siblings actually didn't talk to her for a few years because of some things she said. In her mind, she cut them off, but it was the other way around. She's one of those people who gets into an argument and rather than apologize will go back at the other person with a verbal knife instead of letting it go. I don't blame her siblings for not talking to her that time.

I dread every visit with them. I know they'll be here next month. DH has been more than patient. His parents are nothing like this. I'm one of those women who actually likes my MIL because she's a hands off, pleasant person. I can't stand the idea of having to deal with this until they are too old to travel.

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