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[quote=Anonymous]I don't mean to unkind or snarky and I hope you don't take my post this way.  I just posted on the other thread about regretting having my child with SN.  One of the things that struck me about your post was this:[i]

I'm talking about children going to school, going to camp, children who had friends, activities, vibrant, aware, social beloved children who died suddenly.[/i]

My child with SN goes to school but he's not any of those things you describe.  He requires 24/7 care.  He doesn't have friends nor does he engage in extra-curricular activities by choice.  He goes to a summer 'camp' for kids with significant disabilities which isn't much different than daycare. He doesn't engage in social, reciprocal relationships.  We love him and would feel his absence but I can't say we would grieve.

I'm sure that's very troubling for you to hear because your experience is much different than mine.  Maybe you also have greater capacity to handle it for years on end with no relief in site. I have an older child with ADHD/LDs.  My oldest required a lot of interventions when he was younger but we never felt as challenged or disheartened by his disabilities as we have our youngest.  They are in two totally different levels. I mostly feel depleted and used up.  I feel like I have no reserve and am no longer resilient.  It's not depression (I'm well medicated for that).  It's just a fact of my life.  You can't begrudge me for wishing my life were different than what it is.

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